Another Monday and another week begins in exactly the same way. Here I am, a sole trader, working alone, and lacking in any kind of determination or motivation. I’m drifting through a list of jobs that I’m doing because my diary tells me I must.
But I am feeling nothing.
I’m tired and unmotivated. I’m in a job which sounds romantic but it is ultimately lonely and at the moment feels completely pointless. I have no supervisor or manager to account to and nobody to push me along at work when I’m feeling low.
What’s the point in self-reliance when this morning I cannot rely on myself?
I know if I do the things my diary tells me to do that my mood will lift eventually and I will gain a sense of satisfaction somewhere along the line. Moods come in waves and I’m experienced enough to know that I just have to ride this one out. But I don’t want it and I don’t have to like it.
I hate Mondays.