This job sucks. I don’t know what I’m doing or where I’m going.
When my confidence is heading in a downward direction like this I have only two options: fight on or give up. If I give up and give in then I’d never get out of bed and never get anywhere. This is not an option.
But then if I fight on then what do I fight with? Today I have no co-workers to support me and no-one to kick against. I have zero energy and nobody to pick me up.
I get results because I drive myself relentlessly forward. Perhaps I’m driving myself too hard? Where am I driving myself to? I need to have a period of self-reflection to sort myself out but I must not let this develop into self-pity.
Some days I just can’t do this; I don’t see the point in any of it anymore. I tell myself that this will pass and I will be able to do this again another day. I tell myself to relax and not panic about this. I tell myself to have a cup of tea and a movie and wait. The world will keep turning. It will all be ok soon.